Sit Outside, Idiots.
So here’s the thing: I am currently writing this article on a time crunch because my editor-in-chief is kind of an ass, but on the bright side you’re about to get some of that raw, off the top, incoherent #content that I know you crave so much. So hook up that online IV and let that sweet drip take you back to that feeling of when you got home from school in the 5th grade to a plate of fresh pizza rolls and a new episode of Rocket Power.
I consider you, my readers, as my closest friends. I can think of no more intimate bond than the one that is shared between a man who types out these words in the blue-light glow of his MacBook Air and those who choose to read those words in what is likely the glow of a much less expensive computer because I am rich as hell. So as your best friend let me give y’all a bit of advice: stop being idiots and just sit outside in the summer.
“Wow, I can’t believe a guy on the internet just called me an idiot that must be the meanest thing anyone has ever done to me.”
Welcome to the real world.
I live in Houston, Texas. The weather here in the summer is like if you dropped a swamp inside of an actively erupting volcano. I’m gonna level with you it kinda sucks. But guess where you can find me and the boys enjoying a few cold cervezas at our favorite watering-hole on an Almost Friday evening? Outside. On the patio. Because that’s life. Summer comes every year. Summer is dope. So sit outside and embrace the sweat and the sunburn and the mosquitos that can carry away the smaller children. Order a Coors Light and make sure those mountains are blue and I guarantee you it’ll be more refreshing with the sun on your face than sitting inside with the fact that air-conditioning is destroying our planet weighing on your mind. If it’s not give me a call and I will come drink that beer myself. That’s a promise.
We here at Almost Friday believe in getting out there and #doingthings. Stop cooping yourselves up in the safe air-conditioned spaces of the world and live a little. Live más.
Tag @almostfriday on the ‘Gram this weekend with #almostoutside to get a repost. Let’s start a movement and we’ll see you #outthere.